Language. How can you encourage more?
I remember talking with a Mom about my son not talking much during the day and she said “that sounds nice”.
You realize that’s borderline abuse, right? Lots of autistics don’t like to talk. There’s nothing wrong with that. Being nonverbal is a-okay.
But halving a child’s food portion so they have to ask for more when they may not be capable of doing so? That’s not okay.
Taking and hiding their favourite toys, which for most young auties are very important and paramount to feeling safe and secure, so they have to ask for them? That’s not okay.
Locking the bathroom door so they have to ask? That’s fucking disgusting and not okay.
Taking toys, turning off the tv, standing in our way…those are all ways to cause a shutdown or meltdown, not ways to get us to talk to you. Meltdowns are exhausting and painful and the only reason any of your methods would work is because the autistic child at hand is trying to avoid having a meltdown, not because they’re trying to please you. They’re going to link you with something terrible and unpleasant and do their best to avoid it and you. Is that what you want, to alienate your disabled child?
There are some days when I just can’t talk, nor do I want to. I shouldn’t have to and neither should they. You can’t make a child learn by abusing them, neither should you try. Would you think it’s okay to do those things to an allistic child? Would you want them done to you?
You have to realize that there are so many more ways to communicate than verbal language. Autistics communicate all the time, verbally or not. It’s your job as a parent to learn to speak your child’s language, not abuse them into speaking yours.
Besides, lots of us will use verbal language — when we want to and we feel safe. I would absolutely not feel safe talking to you if I were your child. Maybe the problem isn’t that your child doesn’t want to talk but rather that you are simply not safe or worth talking to.
Jesus fucking christ that article was awful.